The Fullmetal Lady
by JCB13
Summary: In a twist of fate, Ed is forced to dress as a woman and attend finishing school to win the heart of the Fuhrerin's, Riza Hawkeye, son, Hayate. Based off Mulan. Eventually EdWin.


Hello! I hope you enjoy this story!

-The Fullmetal Lady-

-Chapter 1: The Test-

Edward Elric was perched on his bed as the late morning light shone through the windows. Toying with the rice he should have eaten hours ago, he slowly made notes on his arm.

"Fierce… bold… strong… obedient… what was that last one?" he whispered to himself. This last question was answered when a rooster crowed rather loudly.

"PUNCTUAL!" his yell pierced the previously peaceful morning like a flash of lightning pierces a stormy night. He jumped off his bed, knocked off his bowl of rice, and began to blow on his still-wet notes, all in rapid succession. He ran outside to begin his morning chores. Deciding that doing it manually, by himself, would take far too long, he made a decision that a certain golden blonde haired boy would soon hate him for.

"Alphonse! Al! I need your help!" The boy in question ran to his older brother's call.

"Brother? Why are you still here? You're supposed to be at the enlisting right now!"

"I know, Al, I know. I need your help. Can you do my chores today? I'll pay you back some time, I promise!"

"Okay. But please hurry, Brother!" But the older, shorter boy was already running to bid their mother farewell for the day.

Trisha Elric walked, with the assistance of a cane, to her husband's grave. She kneeled down and began to pray when her youngest son ran past her, a trail of food and chickens following him. She just laughed and smiled to herself. Her prayers were soon interrupted by her older son, who came with a tray of tea. When he was almost to his mother, he slipped on the trail his brother had left, which caused the cup on his tray to fall and break.

"Edward," she began.

"I brought a spare." He said, now that he had his mother's attention.

"Edward,"

"Mom, you need to remember to drink your tea,"

"Edward," she again began.

"It'll help with the illness."

"Edward. You should be in town. Soldiers can't be late!"

"I know, Mom. I'm going. Wish me luck!" with a dramatic turn, he began to run down the road into town.

Trisha Elric knelt down to pray for her son once more.

"Hughes, where is your recruit? The Colonel is not a patient man." Said the tall, blonde man known as Jean Havoc.

"Why is he late now? He said he'd be prepared!" Hughes mumbled as Edward ran through the gate into town.

"I'm here!" the small boy announced. "But Hughes, I had to…"

"No excuses! This alone is a reason to be kicked out of the military." Hughes dragged him into the building standing behind them. His black clothes were pulled off, leaving him in only his underwear. The poor boy was then pushed into tub of freezing cold water. His complaints went unheard, as Hughes had already begun to blabber about his darling Elicia.

In the next ten minutes, Ed was pulled out of the icy water, dried, and stuffed into armor that was twice his size. This torture was followed by his hair being pulled into a braid and a helmet being smashed onto his head. He was then pushed into the street, where he soon saw that all of the other enlistees were far ahead of him. He ran to catch up and copy what they were doing, marching in single file, each man the same as any other.

The marching ended as the men arranged themselves in front of their town's military office. A dark haired man exited it, a dramatic flair in his arms.

"Good morning men! I am Colonel Roy Mustang, and I will be in charge of this test. It is my job to judge if you are worthy of joining the Amestrian military. Impress me, and you will join. Fail to do so, and you will be kicked into the mud. I will judge you one at a time. Edward Elric, please come forward."

"Here!" cried the small boy at the end of line.

"Never speak out of turn." responded the colonel.

"Damn." Ed whispered. He walked up the stairs, through the doors, and into the room behind them. Colonel Mustang walked in a full circle around Edward.

"You're a bit small for the military, aren't you?"

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THEY COULD BE SQUISHED WITH AN EYELASH AND THEN DISREGARDED AS A BIT OF DUST IN YOUR EYE, YOU BASTARD!"

"Shows an attitude problem. Not a good sign." A small smirk temporarily spread across his face, before returning to the emotionless look it had before. "Now, please recite the Amestrian Oath."

"Fulfill your duties bravely and obediently. Think only for asparagus, I mean, Amestris!" Ed quickly checked the notes on his arm. "This shall bring glory to the Fuhrerin and to the people."

"I'm not impressed. Now please show me your fighting skills. There is a practice dummy in that corner." He pointed to the right corner. Ed walked to the dummy, drew his sword, and dropped it. It was far too big for him. He managed to heave it behind his shoulder and swing. It flew out of his hands and into the Colonel's torso. The esteemed Colonel fell into the coals behind him, jumped out, and ran out of the room. Ed followed with the kettle that had been sitting above the coals. He poured the water that was in it onto the burned area and handed the kettle to the Colonel.

"You idiot!" screamed Roy Mustang, "you may be wearing the armor of a soldier, but you will never be a soldier!" he yelled as he stormed back into the room. Ed turned back towards his home and contemplated on how to break the shameful news to his mother.

-End-

So, what did you think? Please tell me with a review! I don't know if this should be in the crossover section or not. If it should be, please PM me and I'll fix it immediately.

In is an important notice that will affect everyone on this sight and many others.

I got a message from a fellow writer lazylollipop girl (this is the exact message I got from her) and saw more note and messages from even more, that SOPA is back. The bill that is threatening to take away our freedoms on the internet is back. Not only back, but it is trying to be passed quietly so nobody notices. SOPA will guarantee that anybody who streams a video, whether it be on youtube, a walkthrough for a video game, or a kid singing a song that is 'copyrighted' they will be treated as a felon. That is one of the highest form of criminal offensives for something as simple as uploading a video game walkthrough on youtube, playing a song with lyrics of your favorite artist and even one we all go on, this one right here.

I am telling everyone this because it effect us all here as Wattpad/FanFiction will being attacked as well. A Wattpad/FanFiction writer can being carted off to a maximum state prison for writing a character from Naruto into their fanfic, or a character from Bleach, or a character from One Piece, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, the list is endless. You think I an exaggerating? I assure you that if this passes it will not be long, not be long at all, because once this passes, then anything goes. Wattpad/FanFiction will be attacked for using canon characters in a fanon manner, authors will be arrested for writing a book whose main character has glasses just like in another series, artists will be arrested and confined for using sapphire blue in the iris of one of their characters like another author. This effect us all and we can not let it happen.

I figure some of you do not believe me and I can understand. I could be making this up for all you know. But I provided links below to show you I am telling the truth. Simply remove the spaces below, see for yourself.

: / www . huffingtonpost 2013/08/07/unauthorized-streaming-felony_n_3720479 . html

: / www . washingtonpost blogs/the-switch/wp/2013/08/05/sopa-died-in-2012-b ut-obama-administration-wants-to-revive-part-of-it /

: / www . techdirt articles/20130805/12472124074/administration-cant- let-go-wants-to-bring-back-felony-streaming-provis ions-sopa . shtml

: / www . youtube watch?v=1fTt4K4Cae4

We are not as powerless as we might think. We stopped SOPA before and we must do it again. Our stories, our ideas, our passion will be threaten. Everything from this to fan art to youtube is in danger of being gone forever.

I am asking you to spread the word and fight this assault on our freedoms. Because this isn't just going to affect Americans, it will affect everybody across the globe. Tell you friend, have they spread the word so we may stand up to fight this. It is our right as freedom of speech. We are not making money doing what we love, we do it because we enjoy it and want to spread our words, our ideas, our art to everyone who wishes to see it. but we can stop it but only if we stand together. Please my friends, my fellow reader and writers, don't let what we love be nothing but dust in the winds of time.


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